Toxic people


Have you ever met a toxic person? Here are some of their behaviors:

They expect people to do things for them. They expect people to change for them. They hold other  people responsible for things in their life ie it is not their fault. They “vent” a lot (dumping  emotional garbage onto others). They criticise a lot. They talk about other peoples problems or personal stuff when they are not around in a critical manner. They  ruin the mood of others because they are in a bad mood. They try to make others feel guilty   to get their way. They are over-jealous of someone’s success, looks, friendships or achievements. But they might brag about their success! They try to control others by telling them what kind of hair they should have, or clothes to wear, what to eat, or who they shouldn’t hang out with etc.

They get hurt or upset all the time. They give their opinion but won’t listen to others. They cause unnecessary drama when bored. They love giving you the silent treatment, (which is also called being passive aggressive). They give ultimatums. Example: “You do what I want, or I will quit school and break up with you!” Sometimes they can even be physically and verbally abusive. They often are negative.

They feel angry when other people are happier, more successful, or more good looking than they think they are themselves.

They have to be right about things and hate it when someone corrects them.

Maybe someone in your life is behaving like this towards you? Sometimes  they are like this as  the result of growing up in a toxic environment. With introspection and understanding it is possible to change. Counseling is necessary in most cases.  But there can be no change without taking responsibility first, and toxic people do not like responsibility.

If you tried to reach out to someone like this and they are unwilling to improve, then the most loving thing is sometimes just to leave. Staying with a toxic person enables their behavior and it hurts your mental and emotional health at the same time.